Do you hear your heart?

When did I stop being honest with myself? Was it when the need to do something "important" trumped the desire to do what I loved? Did I let my ego gain control of my life and twist its claws into my soul, squeezing the life out of it and leaving it for dead? That poor soul, so frightened, so caught up in the material and status gains that it hid away making endless excuses for why it was subjecting itself to this torture.

It is really difficult to be totally honest. I find it downright painful, in fact. It is much easier to preen in front of the mirror of my conscience and tell it all the good things I have done, and the well thought out reasons for having done them. It is not fun having that mirror glare back at you and ask "So how do you really feel? Does your heart sing? Do your feet tap? Does time float away, unnoticed? Or does your gut squirm with the poison of misdirected actions? The bile of doing the right thing? Of looking good for society and those who appear to matter?"  Oh shut up, I sneer, its only indigestion.

So we (I) strive for congruency, for centredness. I coach on how to be centred. How to find that North Star, the passion and purpose that makes us thrill with the dawn of each day. But back at home the mirror frowns back at me and asks, "So coach what have you done for you today?"

These days I actually do stop and listen. These days I stand silent and still and listen to my heart. It plays a soulful tune, one that reminds me of a person I once wanted to be. Of a person I still can be. It reminds me of my strength and tells me there is still time. I wonder, do you hear it too? Do  you hear your tune, the one that hits the centre of your heart and sets it beating?

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